Discovering what life is about

3 things to be happy

for a man to be happy in his life, he requires three things

A roof above his head

Food in his stomach

And lastly, something to look forward to.





Three Things You Need to Have to Be Happy

April 1, 2014 by mike

Are you happy?


I mean consistently, get out of bed, enthused about another day happy?


Or, do you wake up and wonder if it’s the weekend yet? Or worse, if it’s the weekend already, do you still wake up and wonder when the weekend is coming?


I was talking with a client the other day and he told me about a psychologist he heard being interviewed on the radio, and the psychologist had a very simple three-step process to being happy. He said that if you examine all the happy people in the world, they generally all have these three things in common. Here’s what they are:


#1) Someone to love. This is an important ingredient for happiness for many reasons, but one of the biggest is that it gets you thinking of someone else other than you. Let’s face it – the quickest way to feeling miserable is to think only about yourself all the time. If you don’t believe me, just try it for a few hours.


When you have someone to love, however, you spend much more of your time thinking about their welfare instead of your own. Also, you now have someone to share life with – both the good and the bad. You are no longer in this thing alone. You have someone on your side and someone who knows you and cares about you. This someone to love can be a spouse, a partner, or someone you are dating or in a relationship with.


The person can also be a son or daughter, or even another family member. In some instances the bond with a pet can be strong enough for awhile. I remember once I got a cat and told my chiropractor, and she asked how long I had been without a pet. I told her over 10 years and she said, “How did you go so long without unconditional love?”


John Lennon said, “All you need is Love.” It turns out there are two more things you need to have:


#2) Something to do. Boredom is a killer. It can kill a relationship, a vacation or just a weekend. In fact, compare how you feel when you don’t have anything planned for a weekend to how you feel when you wake up with a list of things to accomplish or enjoy. It’s a different experience, isn’t it?


Mark Twain said “To be busy is man’s greatest happiness,” and I agree. That’s one of the reasons I love sales. In sales there is always plenty to do. There are people to call, deals to close, clients to work with, and sales reps to train. I have a thousand things to do in my business, and I love them all.


After work I fill my time with the gym, with writing, with friends and, of course, with spending time with my wife. Together we make plans to get together with friends, find ways to help others and then engage in one of our favorite activities – planning vacations and trips together. And that leads to the third thing you must have to be happy:


#3) Something to look forward to. The other day, I was looking at an email from a travel site I subscribe to ( and they had just sent out their weekly travel specials. I almost deleted it because I have a very busy second quarter coming up, but I opened it at the last moment.


When I went down the list of travel deals they had, I was amazed to see a deal to Honolulu for five nights that included air for two and a five night stay at my favorite hotel on Waikiki Beach – the Mona Surfrider. It included airport transfers, breakfast for five days and even two cocktails each evening. The price was amazing. Ten minutes later my wife and I were booked!


What’s amazing about this is how I felt immediately after I paid for our reservation. Before it I was feeling a little overwhelmed by all the work I had to do. But the moment I got off the phone with Pleasant Holidays, I was a changed man! There was a lightness in my step, and all I could think about was getting there and sitting on the beach watching the sun set the first night. I could already feel the soft trade winds blowing and the Hawaiian band playing there under the Banyan Tree. Heck, I get excited by it just writing this!


It was at that moment I realized and remembered how important it is to have something to look forward to.


As I listened to my client describe the three things you need to be happy I smiled to myself when I realized I agreed. In that moment, happiness was simple. And when I hung up with him and thought about it some more, I realized that I was indeed happy.


And that made me smile some more….


Ref :









Of course it is.


Why would you expect any different? The view that life ought to be all exciting and rich with amazing experiences stems from the skewed representations of life portrayed by the media.


I remember one of Brad Pitt's dialogues from the movie Fight Club,


“All of us grow up thinking that we'll be superstars, billionaires, famous celebrities and so on. The only problem is we won't.”


You see? Life isn't what the world likes to show it as. There are hardships, problems, happiness, and everything in between. But no matter what, at the baseline Life just consists of us trying to survive through time on a daily basis.


So yes. Life really is boring.


Still, answering beyond what my questions requires me to (that's a bad habit of mine), a boring life doesn't really have to be something undesirable… in a sense.


It was probably Hawthorne or Shaw who said that, for a man to be happy in his life, he requires three things


A roof above his head

Food in his stomach

And lastly, something to look forward to.


So my friend, a boring life simply suggests you need to find a purpose in life. Something to look forward to, something to strive for, something to hope for in future. It's like the almighty imploring you to give your existence a blo*dy meaning!








As it is you have already done enough. You have made life boring, some achievement! Life is such a dance of ecstasy and you have reduced it to boredom. You have done a miracle! What else do you want to do? You can’t do anything bigger than this. Life boring? You must have a tremendous capacity to ignore life.


The word ‘ignorant’ means the capacity to ignore. You must be ignoring the birds, the trees, the flowers, the people. Otherwise, life is so tremendously beautiful, so absurdly beautiful that if you can see it as it is, you will never stop laughing. You will go on giggling, at least inside.


Life is not boring, but the mind is boring. And we create such a mind, such a strong mind, like the Wall of China around ourselves. It does not allow life to enter into us. It disconnects us from life. We become isolated, encapsulated, windowless. Living behind a prison wall you don’t see the morning sun, you don’t see the birds on the wing, you don’t see the sky in the night full of stars. And, of course, you start thinking that life is boring. Your conclusion is wrong. You are in the wrong space; you are living in the wrong context.


You must be a religious person, because to make life boring one has to be religious. One has to be very scholarly. One has to know Christianity, Hinduism, Islam. One has to learn much from the Vedas and the Koran and the Bible. You must be very well-informed. A man who is too well-informed, too knowledgeable, creates such a thick wall of words, futile words, empty words around himself so that he becomes incapable of seeing life. Knowledge is a barrier to life.


Put aside your knowledge! And then look with empty eyes. Life is a constant surprise. I am not talking about some divine life; the ordinary life is so extraordinary. In small incidents you will find the presence of godliness; a child giggling, a dog barking, a peacock dancing. But you can’t see if your eyes are covered with knowledge. The poorest man in the world is the man who lives behind a curtain of knowledge.


The poorest are those who live through the mind. The richest are those who have opened the windows of no-mind and approached life with no-mind.


This is not only your experience. You are not alone in it. In fact, the majority of people will agree with you. They don’t find any surprise anywhere. And each moment there are surprises and surprises because life is never the same. It is constantly changing and it takes such unpredictable turns. How can you remain unaffected by the very wonder of it? The only way to remain unaffected is to cling to your past, to your experience; to your knowledge, to your memories, to your mind. Then you cannot see that which is. You go on missing the present.


Miss the present and you live in boredom. Be in the present and you will be surprised that there is no boredom at all. Start by looking around a little more like a child. Be a child again! That’s what meditation is all about, being a child again – a rebirth, being innocent again, not-knowing. That’s what we were talking about the other day. The master said: “Not knowing is the most intimate.”


Yes, you must have become very alienated from life, hence boredom. You have forgotten the intimacy, the immediacy. You are no longer bridged. Knowledge functions as a wall, innocence functions as a bridge.


Start looking around like a child again; go to the seashore and start collecting seashells again. See a child collecting seashells, as if he has found a mine of diamonds. So thrilled he is! See a child making sand castles. How absorbed he is, utterly lost, as if there is nothing more important than making sand castles. See a child running after a butterfly…and be a child again. Start running after butterflies again. Make sand castles, collect seashells.


Don’t live as if you know. You know nothing! All that you know is about and about. The moment you know something, boredom disappears. Knowing is such an adventure that boredom cannot exist. With knowledge, of course it can exist. With knowing it cannot exist. Let me remind you, I am not talking about some divine knowledge, some esoteric knowledge; I am simply talking about this life. Just look around with a little more clarity, with a little more transparency, and life is hilarious!


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Only if you make it so. All around you - every day - are wonderful things and wonderful people. All you have to do is be interested and interact. Take your lunch to a park to eat. Sit on the porch and watch a sunset. Call up a friend to go to a movie or just for a walk. Get a hobby you love. You won’t live long enough to find out everything about it!


Go walk dogs at the local animal shelter. When you are going through a drive-through, pay for the guy’s lunch behind you without him knowing about it.


Life is only boring if you don’t appreciate anything - or if you hang out with others who don’t appreciate anything either. Life doesn’t knock on your door and invite you to do fun things - that’s something you do for yourself. Even more importantly - do fun and nice things with and for other people. Make friends who get joy out of life. Do things with THEM. Before you know it, you won’t have enough hours in the day to do all you want to do - and you’ll go to bed happy for the great day you had.


It is just simply - and wonderfully - in your power.





“Boring” is a state of mind where mind is unable to logically find a subject to work on which will give you results.

Boredom can be related to how gamers feel when they play with cheat codes. Without cheat codes,

they have more enthusiasm. If you’re in God mode, definitely you’ll be bored.

People who are working on something are fully occupied on it, be it good or bad. But boredom for prolonged duration will lead to depression.

Life’s not boring if you have people around. Because human mind’s happiness actually is a measure of the social welfare.

That’s why even if you leave your country, you feel depressed seeing no one whom you can relate to in any subjects or context.

But they being human will definitely give you a chance to build your social circle from scratch. Boredom is a very loose term.

Categories : Life purpose    Themes : Psychology
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